Did you know, it has been now just over a year since I started blogging and started in the crockery hire business. Wow, time really does fly and just under x40 blog posts later I figured that I would write something a little different. I spend a lot of my time on here talking about the things that I buy, vintage things that I do to my home, what I make and style. This is all well and good but only a small part of who I am. I think in this diverse world of blogging and online interactions it’s always good to reveal a little more and share something else about my life with my readers.
So vintage is a big part of who I am, it certainly helps to make up my identity. However, the largest thing that makes me who I am, is my faith. Some of you may know, some of you may not, however I do hope this doesn’t make people hit the cross button when they read this. This post isn’t really about God per say and is a practice I am learning which can be applied by a person of faith or by an atheist. It’s about living in the moment.
I am a sucker for filling the diary, rushing around trying to fit everybody and everything in, I know so many women are like this. I guess a part of me wanted to please people and do all the things that were “expected” of me. I realised however that it was only me that was expecting these things, no one else, not my friends, my family or my husband. It was frustrating me not being able to do everything I wanted to do and making me almost angry and not enjoy the amazing things that are in my life. I have realised in this past year that pleasing people is not the answer as in the end it makes a frazzled and very tired Emily, this Emily is not fun and not the person I knew I wanted to be, or God wanted me to be in fact.
So I did a lot of soul-searching, I read a lot of books ( one in particular about an atheist woman’s time spent with the Amish) – I know now you really think I’m weird, but stick with me!! I prayed and I stepped back from my life. I made countless lists, I know many of you are smiling at this as you do it too, lists of priorities as I began to realise that I needed to eradicate from my life the things that weren’t necessary, the things that perhaps I was doing because I thought I had to. I realised that I had to learn to say no to things and to people as we can not do everything. In such a fast paced world it is almost expected, especially as women, that we be all things for all people. It really doesn’t have to be that way. So I really thought about what was important; husband, family and community ( my friends) and worked out creative and fun ways to be with them whilst still tapping into my passions. This is all a working progress by the way, by no means conquered completely!!
Another thing that has really hit me recently is the importance of doing one thing at a time. I know this sounds incredibly obvious but really, especially at work, I was trying to juggle so many plates. I was doing it in my social life too and to be honest I felt like they were about to come crashing down on my head. It’s not about just doing one thing at a time though, I am in the process of working out how to live in the moment, doing that thing, whatever it may be and giving my whole focus to it. So be it washing up the dishes or answering work emails. I don’t try to wash up and make a mental list of all the other things I have to do, or wash up and try to clean the entire kitchen at the same time. I wash up and try to actually enjoy washing up, standing there and taking it in rather than rushing through to the next thing. I know your reading this thinking I have gone a bit loopy but it doesn’t just apply to washing up, apply it to everything that you just do in life. It starts to make the whole task a whole lot more fun and interesting too rather than just something to tick off on the tick list!!
I guess what I have been trying to say in a nutshell is I am learning what is important. My conclusions so far are family and community are at the heart of who I am, people make me happy, chatting on the phone to family and friends, being creative makes me happy, walking and being in creation makes me happy, chatting over a hot squash ( in a vintage tea cup) and cake makes me happy so I am making time for those things in my life. I am also enjoying what I am doing as I am doing it, from the mundane to the amazing holiday times, when we live and enjoy each moment, cherishing EVERYTHING that we do, life feels more grounded and content, the way I would believe, God intended it to be.